The other day I got coffee with a friend, and we started talking about work. She talked about her coworkers, her tasks, and all the drama the two brought about in her life. She spoke animatedly about her discontent with her circumstances.
Soon I found myself walking along the same path. All of my frustrations with work and coworkers bubbled up, and I felt as though I couldn’t stop. My stories encouraged her to tell more stories, and her stories fueled mine. We spiraled into judgements and accusations, and it just felt like word vomit–I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. We were fueling each other’s madness–we were cray cray!
This is what Jesus is talking about in the Course when He says we’re all insane. We all believe that things outside of us are affecting us! We forget that we are the creators of our reality and can change how we feel at ANY TIME!
After we hugged goodbye and left the coffeehouse, I felt exhausted–completely drained and hopeless. I felt depressed about my job and my circumstances. On top of that, I felt I’d let myself down by getting sucked out of my right mind and into the craziness.
Before I took another step down the path toward guilt, I thought “Stop the cray cray!” and I decided to go to Holy Spirit.
As He and I looked at this together, I realized that I didn’t want to hurt my friend’s feelings by not joining her. I feel like people want to hear that they aren’t the only one who feels a certain way or has to deal with difficult situations. And the truth is, they aren’t. We all face situations that make us crazy every day…it’s just the way we choose to react to them that’s different.
But by joining with her and reinforcing those stories of anger, annoyance, and fear, I was invalidating my Truth, and her Truth as well.
In Truth, I have the peace of God, and nothing can bother me. There is no such thing as annoying coworkers or a lack of abundance. There’s no such thing as depression, fear, and exhaustion.
As Jesus says in Chapter 24:
It is not you who are so vulnerable and open to attack that just a word, a little whisper that you do not like, a circumstance that suits you not, or an event that you did not anticipate upsets your world, and hurls it into chaos. Truth is not frail. Illusions leave it perfectly unmoved and undisturbed.
As Holy Spirit helped me bring all of this to light, I realized that I needed to forgive myself for believing these things about me. Holy Spirit would NEVER condemn me for falling off the wagon and gossiping and complaining a little bit, so I shouldn’t either. I wasn’t forsaking my path, or revoking my trust in Holy Spirit. I just forgot for a little while.
Then, I forgave myself for seeing my friend as small, limited, and vulnerable. I extended compassion to her, and asked Holy Spirit to help me see the Truth in her. The card above is a perfect affirmation of this–my friend appeared to be stuck in the drama, but I could still love her and acknowledge the truth in her.
I asked Holy Spirit what I should do when I’m faced with other situations like this, and He told me this:
“Do not be afraid to listen to your friends and family as they tell you their stories. Simply observe them, and observe what their stories bring up in you. They are here with a message for you. Don’t feel like you have to figure it out in the moment. Just listen. Be a friend. Take your time, and choose Peace. Respond from a centered place, and just keep forgiving.”
Are there times when you get sucked into the drama? If you do, don’t freak out! Stop the cray cray and forgive! Forgive yourself, and forgive the so-called drama queens (or kings). Ask Holy Spirit for guidance, and He’ll be there in a hurry. You always have the right to say “Stop the cray cray!”